Answer 1

The only thing wrong with a perfect drive to work is that you end up at work.

Answer 2

Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life!

Answer 3

Monday is the root of all evil.

Answer 4

Why did the bathtub salesman quit?
He was knee deep in hot water.

Answer 5

Worker: You have to give me a raise. There are 3 other companies after me.
Boss: Really? What other companies are after you?
Worker: The gas company, the telephone company, and the electric company.

Answer 6

Worker: I can't come in today. I'm having problems with my eyes.
Boss: What's wrong with them?
Worker: I just can't see myself coming into work today.

Answer 7

To make a long story short... well, it helps if the boss walks in!

Answer 8

"I'm not working in that sweatshop anymore. Sweat isn't in such high demand anymore."

Answer 9

Beat the 5 o'clock rush... leave work at noon.

Answer 10

Did you hear about the guy that was fired from the canning factory?
He got caught taking a pea.

Answer 11

Boss: You don't look very busy.
Worker: That's what happens when you do it right the first time.

Answer 12

"I'd quit my job but I need the sleep."

Answer 13

I pretend to work here and they pretend to pay me.

Answer 14

What do you get when you cross a transatlantic aircraft with an...

Answer 15

Answer 16

Some cause happiness wherever they go. You make it whenever you go.

Answer 17

What is the new low-fat Christian wafer called? "I Can't Believe...

Answer 18