Sign In
Sign Up
Share Jokes
Request Jokes
Popular Topics
Top Characters
Yo Mama So Hot
Bare it all babe
Go with the flow
Categories
Adult & Dirty
(1,040)
Childrens & Clean
(977)
Cooking & Food
(343)
Education
(324)
Entertainment & Arts
(650)
Health & Beauty
(763)
Jobs & Business
(328)
Misc. Themes
(1,552)
Relationships & Family
(1,025)
Science & Tech
(232)
Society & Nature
(1,504)
Sports & Hobbies
(187)
Travel & Places
(368)
Most Popular Topics
adult
animals
body
business
children
clean
crime
dirty
education
ethnic
food
health
insults
jobs
memes
music
places
politics
relationships
religion
science
sex
society
sports
women
Call
1800Asshole.com
Proud to be an Equal Opportunity Hata
Badass Halloween Costume
Dirty Animal jokes
Tweet
dirty
animals
adult
Requested
in
Adult & Dirty
by
JustMe
edited
by
MC Jester
16 Jokes
6
like
0
dislike
What's the difference between a bullfrog and a horny toad?
The bullfrog says "ribbit, ribbit." The horny toad says "rub it, rub it."
Shared
by
K OS
6
like
0
dislike
A penguin driving cross-country breaks down in hot Arizona. He limps his car into town and finds a garage/mechanic. The mechanic says its gonna be an hour to diagnose the problem and suggests an ice cream store down the road where the penguin can stay cool.
The penguin goes to the ice cream store and orders a cup of vanilla ice cream. Penguin doesn't have opposable thumbs and can't hold a spoon, so he uses his flippers to bat as much ice cream into his mouth as he can, but he makes an awful mess on his face.
After an hour, the penguin goes back to the auto mechanic for the diagnosis. The mechanic says, "it looks like you blew a seal". The penguin says, "NO,NO, that's just ice cream.
Shared
by
a contributor
edited
by
a contributor
3
like
0
dislike
What's a shitzu?
A zoo with no animals.
Shared
by
JustMe
2
like
0
dislike
What's the difference between a fish and a mountain goat?
One mucks about in fountains, one fucks about in mountains...
Shared
by
JustMe
edited
by
JustMe
2
like
0
dislike
My girlfriend called me a filthy pervert the other day... I said "fuck me, a talking sheep."
Shared
by
a contributor
2
like
0
dislike
An elephant says to a camel "why are your tits on your back?" The camel says "I think that's a strange question coming from somebody whose dick is on his face!"
Shared
by
JustMe
edited
by
MC Jester
2
like
0
dislike
Why do you wrap duct tape around a hamster?
So it doesn't explode when you fuck it.
Shared
by
NumeroOcho
2
like
0
dislike
What is worse than having a sick cat on your piano?
Having an infected pussy on your organ!
Shared
by
a contributor
2
like
0
dislike
As I sat on the edge of my bed pulling off my boxers... I thought to myself "you've gotta leave those dogs alone."
Shared
by
a contributor
1
like
0
dislike
Where are an elephant's sex organs?
In his feet. If he steps on you you're fucked!
Shared
by
a contributor
0
like
0
dislike
What's the difference between a cow and a bull?
Milk both of them and the one that smiles is the bull.
Shared
by
JustMe
0
like
0
dislike
What is the best way to eat a frog?
Put its legs behind its ears.
Shared
by
a contributor
0
like
0
dislike
How many animals can you fit on a toilet?
A pussy and 1,000 hares!
Shared
by
K OS
Your joke
Related jokes
6
jokes
Dirty Poem jokes
Requested
in
Adult & Dirty
by
If Then
Roses are red, Pickles are green, I love your legs and what's in...
12
jokes
Dirty Religious jokes
Requested
in
Adult & Dirty
by
NumeroOcho
its the middle of winter, recess has just started two boys walk...
14
jokes
Dirty Redneck jokes
Requested
in
Adult & Dirty
by
NumeroOcho
there were two rednecks drinking beer and redneck one asked...
6
jokes
Short Dirty jokes
Requested
in
Adult & Dirty
by
NumeroOcho
What is the difference between like, love and hate? Spit, swallow,...
4
jokes
Dirty One Line jokes
Requested
in
Adult & Dirty
by
NumeroOcho
Make love and war... Fuck your enemy!