Answer 1

How many Jewish-American princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?
What? And wreck my nails?

Answer 2

What is the only thing a JAP will go down on?
The escalator at Neiman Marcus

Answer 3

What does a JAP make for dinner?
Reservations.

Answer 4

How do you know if a JAP has an orgasm?
She drops her nail file.

Answer 5

What are 3 words a JAP will never hear?
Attention K-Mart Shoppers

Answer 6

What is a JAP's favorite w(h)ine?
When are you going to take me to Miami?

Answer 7

What does a JAP do to her asshole every morning?
Kisses him and sends him off to work.

Answer 8

What's the difference between a JAP and a barracuda?
The barracuda doesn't wear lipstick.

Answer 9

Why does a Jewish American Princess wear a gold diaphragm?
So her boyfriend will think he's coming into money.

Answer 10

What do you call a JAP on a water?
1. Lake Placid
2. The Dead Sea

Answer 11

What is a JAP's idea of natural childbirth?
Absolutely no makeup

Answer 12

How do you stop a JAP from screwing?
Marry her.

Answer 13

What's the difference between a JAP and the Bermuda triangle?
The Bermuda triangle swallows seamen.

Answer 14

What is the difference between a Vulture and a Jewish Princess? Nail Polish!

Answer 15

Why are JAPs hyochondriacs?

Increasing their odds of meeting a nice doctor!

Answer 16

What do you say to a baby Jewish American princess?
"Gucci Gucci Goo"

Answer 17

Why do JAP's close their eyes while screwing?
So they can pretend they're shopping!

Answer 18

What do you call a Jewish American Princess' waterbed?
The Dead Sea

Answer 19

What is a JAP's favorite sexual position?
Facing Bloomingdale's.

Answer 20

Why does a Jewish American Princess close her eyes during sex?
So she can fantasize about shopping!

Answer 21

What is the difference between a Jewish American Princess and Jell-O?
Jell-O wiggles when you eat it.

Answer 22

What is a JAP's favorite w(h)ine?
But he promised to marry me!

Why did Monica think Bill would marry her?
Bill gave her the ring from the cigar.
(that's okay a Monica gave Bill a lipstick ring!)

Answer 23

According to Monica, if your cigar starts to smoke, you are doing it way to fast.  Monica recommends Kentucky Jelly (you do know what the postal abbreviation of Kentucky is, don't you?)

Answer 24

Of course Bill should have known nit to have a JAP for an intern as everyone knows, JAPs do not swallow.
Yep, Bill did not inhale and Monica did not swallow.

Answer 25

Why don't Sharks eat Jewish Princesses? Professional courtesy!

Answer 26

Did you hear about the Jewish American Princess horror movie?
Debbie does dishes!

Answer 27

How does a JAP call her children to dinner?

Get in the car!

Answer 28

What is the difference between a JAP and a bowl of jello?

Jello moves when you eat it!

Answer 29

Why does a JAP close her eyes when having sex?

She can't bear to see someone else enjoying themselves!

Answer 30

How does a JAP screw in a light bulb?

She holds it up to the ceiling and waits for the world to revolve around her.



(True story: I told this one to a JAP girlfriend years ago, and her instantaneous and witty comeback was, "...which doesn't take too long.")

Answer 31

How does a JAP develop crows feet around her eyes?
From saying, "Suck WHAT????"

Answer 32

jewish kids little spoiled and bratty then i see hmm very unusual get it its brian peter tucci isreal one texas and bruno to him even at meeting no link sneal some in peter scott your loving uncle--

Answer 33

JAP MIssionary position, man on top womanat bloomingdales

Answer 34

husband to jap wife

him  did i hurt you?

her no,why?

him you moved

Answer 35

Q: Did you hear about what happened to the mohel who had cataracts...

Answer 36

Answer 37

How does a Jewish-American Princess do it doggy style? She makes...

Answer 38

How do you Circumcise a Red Neck? Kick his sister in the Mouth!

Answer 39