Answer 1

What happened when a UTEP football player transferred to ASU?
The average SAT score for both schools increased.

Answer 2

What do you get when you drive by ASU?
A degree

Answer 3

What does it say at the bottom of every ASU diploma?
Always ask "Would you like fries with that?"

Answer 4

What do you get when you put 32 Arizona State cheerleaders together in the same room?
A full set of teeth

Answer 5

How do you get an ASU cheerleader in your dorm room?
Grease up her hips and push really hard!

Answer 6

Why can't most ASU players get in a huddle on the field?
It's a parole violation to associate with known felons.

Answer 7

Did you hear the ASU library burned down?
Saddest part was half the books weren't colored in yet!

Answer 8

Why do ASU fans smell so bad?
So blind people can hate them too!

Answer 9

How many Arizona State University freshman does it take to change a light bulb?
None. That's a senior course.

Answer 10

Why doesn't ASU have ice on the sidelines?
The guy with the recipe graduated.

Answer 11

What do you call a person from ASU in a three-piece suit?
The defendant

Answer 12

What's the difference between a litter of puppies and ASU fans?
Eventually puppies grow up and stop whining!

Answer 13

Why will you never find a nativity scene on the campus of asu?
Impossible to find three wise men and a virgin!

Answer 14

What do Geico Insurance and asu have in common?
So easy a Caveman can do it!

Answer 15

Why did asu go to AstroTurf in asu stadium?
To keep the cheerleaders from grazing during games!

Answer 16

How do you get an asu alum off your porch?
Pay for the pizza!

Answer 17

Nursing: Learning to save people's lives while struggling not to...

Answer 18

How many Duke students does it take to change a light bulb? Three....

Answer 19

How many Princeton students does it take to change a light...

Answer 20

Jeremy: But, officer, I am a college graduate. Police Officer:...

Answer 21

Dawn of the planet of Obama care.