Answer 1

Answer 2

What do you get when you mix LSD and birth control?
A trip without the kids!

Answer 3

"I said 'no' to drugs but they just wouldn't listen!"

Answer 4

A boy asks his grandmother nervously "have you seen the pills I left at your house? They're labeled LSD."

His grandmother replies "fuck your pills! Have you seen the dragon in my kitchen?!"

Answer 5

"I used to have a drug problem but now I have more money."

Answer 6

One day a small rabbit was taking a run through the forest. As he was running he came upon a giraffe. This giraffe was about to shoot up some heroin. The rabbit looked at the giraffe for a moment and then said "Giraffe, don't do heroin. Heroin is a drug and drugs are bad for you. Come running with me through the forest." The giraffe looked at the rabbit, then at the heroin, then back at the Rabbit, and then threw the needle away. The two then proceeded to run though the forest.
 
While running through the forest they came upon a sheep. This sheep was about to smoke a joint. The rabbit looked at the sheep for a moment and then said "Sheep, don't smoke pot. Pot is a drug and drugs are bad for you. Come running with us through the forest. The sheep looked at the rabbit, then at the joint, then back at the rabbit, and then threw the joint away. The three then proceeded to run through the forest.
 
The three then stumbled upon a tiger. This tiger was about to crack open a cold beer. The rabbit looked at the tiger for a second and then said "Tiger, don't drink alcohol. Alcohol is a drug, and drugs are bad for you. Come running with us through the forest!"
 
The Tiger then looked at the rabbit, then at the beer, then back at the rabbit, and then cracked open the beer and carefully placed it on the ground next to him. He then proceeded to slowly walk over to the rabbit, lifted his paw up, and then mauled the shit out of the rabbit. After he was done he slowly walked back to the beer, picked it up and started drinking it.

The giraffe and the sheep were shocked. The giraffe looked at the tiger and said "Dude!!! What the fuck? He was just trying to help you!!! Why did you hurt him?"

The tiger slowly looked at the giraffe and then said "Because every time that rabbit does cocaine I end up running through the fucking forest!!!"

Answer 7

Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.

Answer 8

Why did the junkie freak out?
There was an unexpected narc at the door.

Answer 9

Drugs may lead to nowhere but at least it's the scenic route!

Answer 10

Why does the label on children's Tylenol tell you not to operate heavy machinery or vehicles when it's FOR CHILDREN!?

Answer 11

A pothead was walking down a road when a genie appeared in front...

Answer 12

You know you're a pothead when your pot tray is fuller than your...

Answer 13

Answer 14

What makes 9 out of 10 people happy? Gang rape

Answer 15

"I like my women the same as I like my whiskey... 20 years old and...