Answer 1

Not the kind of contact I had in mind....  

Answer 2

Experts say that although Frank Sinatra is dead his act is still...

Answer 3

What do you get when you cross a puppy and a cantaloupe? A...

Answer 4

What do you call poop that comes from a bull? BULLSHIT

Answer 5

Why was the willow weeping? He was unpoplar.

Answer 6

Customer: Do you have any Alligator shirts? Clerk: Yes, sir. What...

Answer 7

How do you make a slow horse fast? Don't feed it.

Answer 8

Patient: Doctor, I'm getting heartburn every time I eat birthday...

Answer 9

Do clowns wear really big socks?

Answer 10

How do you fix a broken tuba? With a "tuba glue"

Answer 11

What is the difference between a trumpet soloist and King...

Answer 12

What is the difference between a guitarist and a savings bond? The...

Answer 13

Answer 14

You might be a Cajun if jalapenos are the secret ingredient in...

Answer 15

What did the corpse's mom do when her son acted up? Ground him

Answer 16

Charlie agreed to a restraining order of 300 yards from Denise...

Answer 17

What did Dale Earnhardt and Hitler have in common? They both...

Answer 18

Answer 19

Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? They fall through the holes.

Answer 20

Do the pamphlet. Whip it out. I need it now!